Keeping God's Secrets

Today was a miraculous day! God very visibly, UNDENIABLY answered my prayer..

Wanted to YELL TO THE WORLD the miracle God just did. I told 2 people - one started crying tears of unbelief, and the other gasped for air in amazement. I called whoever I thought it would bless... the rest, I am keeping this miracle in my heart as long as I can by staying in the conscious presence of Jesus.

If a person didn't answer, I felt they didn't need the message. I only shared to GLORIFY GOD. IT'S NOT ABOUT ME. 

I KNOW THAT WAS GOD GOING OUT OF HIS WAY TO TELL ME TRUST HIM. HE PROVED BEYOND A SHADOW OF A DOUBT TO KNOW HE IS IN CONTROL... DON'T JUST "HOPE" HE IS. 

I am turning off my phone and getting on my knees to be with Him... no distractions.

I feel like the day I was saved! FREE! 

LATER-

I spent several quality hours with Jesus, and it was so refreshing. 

Worship, praise, and contemplation. 

Reading how Joshua took over the Jericho and God told them rid the city of all that was not of Him, they got rid of the people, yet kept the gold and silver...they disobeyed. Keeping the gold may have seemed minute to them, but it was a sin. They disobeyed God. I want my life free of everything that is not of Him. Everything else is meaningless. 

Writing

After my weekend writing retreat, I am redefining myself. Another new chapter in my life has started. Also, reading a book for review. Enjoying staying home. It's cooling off. Summer is my favorite, but last month's electric bill was  $190! I lost a freelance gig which brought in $200 mth. Plus, my new landlord is talking about DOUBLING my rent. Bad part is I don't have money to move. Been selling Christmas cards, which helps. And the holidays are hard when I have no family. I will take sleeping pills on Thanksgiving and Christmas so I sleep through the day. Otherwise, I am escaping by writing and reading.

God will provide. He is Jehovah Jireh. I know He's got me.

Job Description

Jireh goes back to the vet this morning. Watching her in such misery yesterday was excruciating. I can't bare to recount the details. My baby was sick, and I went from feeling helpless to.... well, feeling responsible. My thoughts lingered on Jireh deserves a better mom. And thoughts ran off from there. Earlier, a friend offered to Skype with me so I didn’t feel alone. After saying I didn't want to talk, my friend offered to just be there, making sure I am okay. That meant so much.

With prayers asking for focus, I was able to spend time doing Bible study. Admittedly, I had some difficulty believing. No, I take that back. I fully believe God’s Word. I am afraid of His plan.

This morning, I told Jesus I can't handle seeing my dog in such misery. I wondered how my mom handled the uncertanties of my health issues.  God took care of me. He had His own plan.

Truth is Jireh is God's dog... He is allowing me to take care of her. My job is to take care of her until The Father wants her back. I can't handle this, but it's God's job.

Taking care of me is also His job. My job is to follow Jesus. I have to get back to work.